A few years ago I was at a D of E training day run by the Scouts and the person running the course pointed out that if we wanted to assess at a certain level then we must have specific Scout permits. A bloke at the back chipped in and said (I paraphrase) "I've done my Mountain Leadership Certificate for both summer and winter, have run the Pennine Way, been walking in the Alps etc etc..........I don't see why I should now have to be assessed by the Scout Association!" The room fell silent and we all looked over at one of the County Assessors. He turned round, slowly, and looked straight at the bloke and said, "If tha's as good as tha says tha is, then tha'll pass t'assessment. If tha's not then tha shunt be wi Scouts!" (I have tried to phrase this with the accent). Afterwards I went over and spoke to the Assessor who said that the bloke had already emailed saying how great he was and shouldn't be subjected to assessment "by someone else".
Now, what am I moaning about this week? Well, I think that the key problem here is the arrogance of some people. In the autumn of 1982 I met, for the first time, two people who went on to become great friends. Of course, on first meeting new friends one thing you talk about is where you had been on holiday recently. That summer I had spent six weeks in Nepal and so it was something that I would happily talk about - of course this must have come over as arrogant, "Ooooh! Look at me I've just got back from the Himalayas, aren't I great!" and years later Rich still pulls my leg about it. But was it arrogance or just me stating a fact? Edmund Hilary was pilaried as being arrogant for saying "we knocked the bastard off" after he came down from the first ascent of Everest!
Last year, on meeting my wife for the first time, someone new to our circle of acquaintances, proceeded to tell her all about what he had done, climbed etc not realising that she had done far in excess of his "wonderfulness" (or maybe because she was a woman). She waited until he commented about a mountain that he and a friend had hired a guide to climb the previous year and, obviously having had enough, pointed out that I had climbed the same mountain solo! He didn't take the hint but then some people just don't.
While I'm on this stream of thought the other approach is the "I could have gone to University, but didn't want to/couldn't see the point etc". Why do people feel it necessary to justify that decision - are they questioning why others did choose to go? In my experience this normally leads to the "I can make more money than you...." statement (once, rather amusingly, said to someone who was working towards being a doctor, yes, one of those people who cure illness!).
Some years ago I was involved in the building a rally car and navigated (or was co-driver) for a few years. When you tell people this you always get someone who says "I could have been a rally driver (because I drive fast)". Usually after being in a car with them for less than five minutes you think "no you couldn't, you drive badly!".
When eldest son was at school we got a letter saying how proud they were that Tom had run an assembly for the whole school. We asked Tom why he hadn't told us about it and got the reply "You never asked".
Fast forward to the present day and I recently discovered that a PhD friend of ours had done a considerable amount of research with Rolls Royce into the jet engines that are in aircraft. No, he had never told us as we had never asked!
So, what am I trying to say? Well folks maybe its all about doing stuff rather than just telling people that you have done stuff. After all, as they say, actions speak louder than words!
Here endeth this week's ramble.
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